I am a chicken.

Does anyone else out there sometimes feel like they're just going through life like a chicken with its head cut off? That's how I felt today.

I was at my job, teaching ESL to five 16 year old girls from Japan... and they were all sitting there just staring at me, they didn't have a clue what I was talking about. I kept trying to explain myself.. I was using gestures, writing instructions down (it was like a game of Pictionary for god sakes)... they still had no clue. I don't know how some teachers make it look so easy.. they just get up there and explain everything so easily. I guess I can't give up so quickly though... I mean I only started this job about a month ago..but I feel so out of my element and so uncomfortable standing up there in front of those girls.

After leaving today (I pretty much sprinted out of the high school), I just kept asking myself  if I'll ever be so lucky to find a job that I love to do... something I am passionate about. I don't even know what that word means anymore... passionate. What am I passionate about? Ugh. Stress. Does anybody else think as much as I do about passion? Nothing scares me more then waking up every morning for the next thirty years going to a job that I hate.

Anyway, after my mini-meltdown on the drive home I reminded myself that I am only 24 years old. From a young age I was groomed in school to "figure out what you want to do! You have to have a profession! You have to decide a major in University!"I still have no idea what I want to do with my life. I'm on my way to finishing my Bachelor of Arts in English.... and you know why I finally chose that major? I have no idea if it's what I will love, I just know that I have to have some sort of degree to even have a chance at getting a job I might love.

For those of you who know what you want to do with your life... congratulations... I think you're extremely lucky to know that.. For the rest of us... I hope that with a little bit of luck (and education) we actually won't mind waking up at 7:00am every morning to go to a job.. because it's something we love to do.

Hello, I'm in Deleware: City and Colour

Cheers,
M.

new playlist up...

Check it out.

I put some bands on there from different countries.. to broaden your music knowledge..
Kashmir is from Denmark, they are sick, you really need to listen to the music.
Kent is from Sweden, different language, but you can still appreciate the musicianship.
Crash Kings are this new band I just discovered from L.A area I think.

Hope you like em'

400: Kent

Cheers,
M